Nice to meet you!

Those last few days has been all and about meeting new family members. Mom, dad, stepmom, stepdad, lil brother and little sister. All good, very nice and fun people and I have been treated very well and warm. Lovely people, felt really good!
But also something have been bothering me lately. I feel a distance. A coldness. Maybe even a lack of feeling. Am I. Over reacting or it is just my sixth sense talking? Hard to tell.
Maybe with all the meetings and walking about a was hard to express feeling or be so close as the usual, dunno.
I have this thing that I think he will not be interested anymore, find me boring, unattractive, ugly, and just be out there.
I mean, why would him introduce me his entire family, if that was the case? I feel like they are a very close family, very nice and warming hearted people. And I think that, for him, is just as important to introduce me to his family. But why I have this gut feeling?
Typing this words right now is just making me want to cry. My eyes are full of tears trying to fall down and I am just holding them. Why so emotional? I can't explain or even find a reasonable reason to it.
I mean, it seems that FINALY I found someone that genuinely likes me, and is concerned about my wellbeing, likes to be around me, cuddle, and all. But still, the same bullshit of my trusting and insecure issues haunt me day and night! So tired of this shit!

Maybe tomorrow we will take the boat to Finland. A little "family" trip. Sounds like a great plan. We will see.
Just wish I could take this heavy thing away from me and enjoy all this as much as it want to be enjoyed. Because he deserve it. He makes me happy, when skies are grey! 🎶
Oh well! As usual: wait and see!