I do!

Do you know when you were a little girl and all what you wanted was to meet prince charming, and have the wedding of a princess? Yes, I do too. But for years ago my so-called prince charming destroyed all my dreams and hopes of having it, and since then, I have been a lot skeptical about finding it again.

Even with the relationships I had after all what happened with him, I never thought of it anymore, was more a chance of not being alone and having someone to share to share the good and bad.

And then, i got a daughter, age came, and all of that shit stayed behind me, I never thought about it, or dreamed about it, or hoped of it.

And then, year 2015, 21st century, me, 31 years old, almost 32, caught myself dreaming about it again. Is it even possible? Not that I want a wedding or a prince charming, but it is good to have that butterfly feeling once again. The longing, the excitement, the wait…
It is real good to wake up with some good new and have someone to share it with. Or to be sad, or mad, or worried about something and have someone to talk it over. It is just good to have someone there o listen to you.

And on top of that, see someone with my daughter, treating her as his own, playing, talking, taking care of her. reading bed stories, cooking food, the very simples tasks in life.
Can someone not like -to not say love- someone that does it? I do not think so.

And then I see myself looking at him as my prince charming. With all his flaws and things I don't even like, but still I do!

It is funny, cause I locked myself so hard and back for all those feelings, and now I can't avoid on imagining how would be to wake up next to him everyday, and just saying good bye to have him back at night, everyday… Its just weird. been so long since I had this feeling, that I don't know how to cope.
Is it hard? Is it too soon? Am I being silly and stupid and will be broke again? I don't know.
I just know that, I am so happy, and the butterflies in my tummy doesn't scare me anymore, in fact, they give the best feeling I could ever. A feeling that I had once, and lost. A feeling that, I have wanted to find again, been searching so hard and in so many places… and now it is here, as close as possible.

Then why am I still skeptical and scared? Not sure. But that makes things more exciting! I, for many times, caught myself smiling for apparently no reason, and then when i think about it, I know why. I remember him playing with the kids, reading to them, cooking to them, being silly with them, making jokes about people walking by, or even our silly  inside jokes", that only us laugh about. And then come them again, the butterflies, and GOD! How amazing they are!

Been so long that I saw the world so colorful, sometimes I think I am seeing too much. I really hope not. because I honestly say that I am having one of the best times of my life, and even the problems seems to be easier now, because I am happy! And happiness is the best feeling ever! I didn't even know how good it is, been so long. And I am SO happy that I am happy again, that I just wanna cry!

But not today! Today I am smiling, and will be tomorrow, and hopefully for many days after that. Maybe I will be happily ever after. who knows?!

:D